Why do you need to renew your vows?
Why do you need to renew your vows? Saying your wedding vows to the person who means most to you in this world has probably never been so relevant as now. In these post pandemic times, vow renewal ceremonies are the new weddings for a variety of reasons.
Photo Simon Duggan
Vow renewals are the new weddings!
You may have felt deprived of the wedding ceremony that you wanted and deserved due to three basic reasons: money, control and opportunity.
- Money – not being able to afford the original wedding of your dreams
- Control – someone else was pulling your original wedding planning strings
- Opportunity – circumstances such as COVID-19 meant that you were married without any ceremony
As your circumstances change and you find yourself in a position to have the wedding ceremony you always dreamed of, so you can permit yourself butterflies of excitement and really look forward to planning your dream vow renewal ceremony.
Other great reasons to renew your vows
Of course there are many other great reasons to affirm your vows to your partner in front of witnesses who love you.
- Wedding blessings – some places of religious worship do not have authority to legally marry you, but they can carry out a religious wedding blessing at a later date when you reaffirm your vows
- Arranged marriages – where your partner is chosen for you, your feelings for each other may develop and strengthen over time. A ceremony to renew your vows is often much more meaningful the second time around.
- Surviving a health scare – ill health is a wake up call to us all that our lives together are transient. With a renewed appreciation of health and life, you many also want to recommit yourselves to each other.
- Coming through a rocky patch – no relationships are perfect. If you have come though a roller coaster ride or separated for a time, a personal ceremony to reaffirm your wedding vows is a meaningful statement of your commitment to each other.
- You have changed as a couple – life experiences change us, children change us. Years down the line, we are rarely the same two people who first said, “I do” at the altar. Now is the time to say new vows.
- This is a milestone anniversary! – All life events should be celebrated, and none more so than two people still in love!
Cortijo Las Salinas, Jaen
What happens at a vow renewal ceremony?
Basically anything goes at at vow renewal ceremony. There is no right way and wrong way, only your way. Here are a few ideas you and your celebrant might consider when crafting your celebrations:
- your personal love story – told with warmth and gently humour
- people who attended your original wedding – invited to take part a second time
- readings – some text, lyrics or a poem that resonates with you both
- ring exchange – not everyone can get their ring off after years of wearing it, so a ring warming is just as meaningful and heartfelt
- unity ritual – a visual symbolic gesture such as a cord or ribbons to gently “tie the knot” once more
- personal vows – this is what it is all about. Saying renewed words of commitment to each other is the goose-bump-making centrepiece to your vow renewal ceremony.
Photo Jack Hartley
What should I wear to renew my vows?
Again there is no right or wrong outfit for a vow renewal ceremony.
- Some brides like to wear a traditional white wedding dress with grooms opting for a formal or dress suit.
- Some couples prefer wearing something smart, more along the lines of a wedding-guest outfit.
- Some couples want everyone to feel comfortable in their everyday clothes, perhaps with a little something to signify who the wedding party are – a flower pinned to your clothes, in your hair or carrying a bouquet for example.
Do what feels right for you.
More than even the original day you contracted your marriage, this is YOUR special day. Claim it. Own it. And above all enjoy it.
Photo of Debbie Skyrme, Juanma Segura
Author bio: Debbie Skyrme is Celebrant Spain helping destination wedding couples in Spain by officiating dream ceremonies in the Spanish sunshine.
Real vow renewal video photography by kind permission of: Simon Duggan; Jack Hartley
